Weather for Monday in the Tries (Richland, Kennewick, Pasco WA):

A slight chance of rain in the morning, then mostly cloudy with a high of 53F. The rest of the week looks to be some cloud, some sun, with highs up to 70 and lows down to 32, but higher temps prevailing. 

Mommas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To be….*:

WARNING: Snark Alert!

This isn’t the blog I planned to write, but the subject came up and is too good to pass on.

I saw a 2-minute excerpt of Pastor Stewart Allen-Clark’s sermon the other day and haven’t been able to stop chuckling since. You know him, he’s the Baptist Minister who exhorted the women in his flock to model themselves after our former first lady, the one who has all those soft-porn nude pictures on the internet. (Oh, yeah, they are there.)

So, Pastor Stewart Allen-Clark stands before his congregation telling women they should not wear casual clothes, especially when their man is home. By the way, he was wearing casual trou, shoes, and a dark brown shirt. The shirt was buttoned, but designed to be worn casually, over the casual trou. Alas, it did not hide his beer gut.

Oh! Surely that’s not a beer gut on a Baptist minister! Surely, it’s just a flab gut from all the junk food he eats while in his office working on his exciting misogynistic sermons. Yes?

He goes on, from what I saw and what I read, exhorting the women of his flock to model themselves after the most spectacular, epic, trophy wife ever, Melania Trump. I noticed he did not exhort their husbands to fork over hard-earned cash to pay for personal trainers, or nannies, or household help to help their wives be able to spend the hours necessary getting their bodies into shape, size, and couture. 

No, all Pastor Flab-Gut could talk about was how it’s the woman’s fault she’s home raising his kids, trying to clean house, do the shopping, cook, etc., all while taking care of her man. Eating on the go, because she doesn’t have time to eat properly, and he doesn’t have the income to pay for it, anyhow. And it’s all her fault he’s a victim because he hasn’t the intestinal fortitude to keep his pants zipped when out in the pasture fleecing the flock. And, while she’s at it, why doesn’t she get a real job and contribute to the household? OK, I added that sentence, but you could hear it in the longing of his voice. He’s such a victim.

I can’t help but wonder which photo of Melania he was seeing in his other mind’s eye as he thumped his bible and spouted his hate. Was it the one of her on the faux fur skin on the airline bed? Or one of her standing in nothing but a pair of high heeled shoes? Perhaps he envisioned the one where she was on her stomach, torso raised on her elbows, with her soft breasts hanging down and into his…oh, never mind.

And, Pastor Flab-Gut is, to a point, correct. It is her fault. She should have had better sense than to marry him and buy into all his God put man as head of the house, and then expect her to up with put all his el torro poo poo. 

I just think it’s hilarious that he expects her to look more like the soft porn star, while he looks more like Larry the Cable Guy, but isn’t nearly as funny or as intelligent. Do you think there is just a wee teensy bit of double standard here? And wouldn’t it be both proper and fun if men are going to control our bodies, we should be able to control theirs? Oh, well, I really don’t care, do you?

*Apologies to Waylon & Willie. 

If the World Seems a Tad Off-Axis: Did you set your clocks ahead? Did you Spring into a new time zone? Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a hoot in someplace hot what time we stay in, but that’s the operative word: STAY. There is NO valid reason to keep switching clocks. None. And I don’t buy that “it’s for the kids” that if we stay on DST they’ll have to stand at the bus stop in the dark. It’s an easy fix, start school later. Just, please, for the love of whatever Divine Being you follow, please pick a time and stick to it!

Entertainment:

Netflix: I gave up on Vincenzo, my K-dramedy series. It’s slowed down considerably from what I hoped it would be, but there are plenty of laughs, just not enough of the vengeance parts 😉 Auntie Lenora is warped! She’s also easily bored. There are 20 episodes to this series. No. Nada. Zip. Now watching something different that should have much more humor. More on the new series next week.

Books: for complete reviews please see Rainy Day Reads at http://lenoragood.blogspot.com

Queen of Blood: Book One of The Queens of Renthia —by Sara Beth Durst. Don’t be put off by the title, it’s one of the best fantasy books I’ve read in some time. I can hardly wait to dive into Book 2 😉

Allow me to harken back to last week and my extolling the AWP Conference. I mentioned I’d ordered a few books, two of them were plucked from the mail box yesterday. The Art of Voice, Poetic Principles and Practice —by Tony Hoagland with Kay Cosgrove. Oh, my goodness. Another collection of essays on poetry by the late master! Yes, I started it as soon as unwrapped. And exercises after each essay. A portable class by the late, great Tony Hoagland!

And then icing on the bookcake: When the Living Sing —by Yalie Kamara. I really enjoyed the panels I saw her on, and loved her poetry, so ordered her chapbook. What delightful poems. Yalie is Sierra Leonean-American and brings a shining voice to American poetry!

CDC Guidelines: Oh, joy! The new guidelines are out for those who have had their shots, and I’m one of them. I’ve passed the two-week mark and am considered immune. I still wear my masks in public, and socially distance in public, but contrary to what I said last week, I actually ate in a restaurant the other day. Seoul Fusion (Korean) was open, and there were few diners, and we were all socially distanced. It felt odd, but wonderful. And I had company yesterday, who had also passed their two-week mark, and we were maskless, inside. But socially distant from each other. Oh, it felt downright decadent!

Auntie Lenora and Sammy Brave Dog ask you to please continue to observe the rules, wear your masks, socially distant yourselves, unless CDC approved to do otherwise. Let’s get through this and come out on the other side. See you next week 😉